What to do after a Divorce

And from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.

John 1:16

We need to uphold and encourage the sanctity of marriage, and at the same time, give grace towards those whose marriages failed. Not everyone who is divorced either wanted to divorce or ever planned to be divorced. Sometimes it’s difficult for believers to know what to do after divorce. There are many questions and even a crisis of faith in divorce. The following six steps can help start the healing process after divorce:

Step 1: Remain in the faith by trusting in God with all your heart.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Step 2: Repent of your actions that may have contributed to the divorce.
“Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, and that he may send the Christ appointed for you, Jesus.” (Acts 3:19)

Step 3: Reserve a place in your heart for God to bring healing and peace.
“Peace, peace, to the far and to the near,” says the LORD, “and I will heal him.” (Isaiah 57:19)

Step 4: Resist the urge to quickly find a replacement spouse.
“A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing.” (Ecclesiastes 3:5)

Step 5: Recognize the need for you to forgive your former spouse.
“Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” (Colossians 3:13)

Step 6: Remember to give yourself time to grieve, let go, and move on.
“Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13)